6 Signs Indicating You've Lost Control of Your Addiction
6 Signs Indicating You've Lost Control of Your Addiction
What are the signs which show that you've lost power over your addiction? Relying on the use of a substance while trying to carry out your obligations can be very exacting.
Living with the struggle of addiction for years, I finally can get back on my feet in a normal life after having to overcome stress and discomfort. The world might as well have crashed onto itself and it would've weighed exactly the same to me.
When I began using I felt like all of my fears were rendered inactive.
The negative feelings and thoughts that I felt like almost killed me became one with the false alarm of happiness, dragging me even further to the depression hole and endless tunnels.
One of the most difficult phases of my dependence were the first few months before really going into therapy. Not realizing that I have lived with addiction problem gave me time to make up reasons why I acted like a person with no direction, giving up everything I worked hard for, everyone I care about left me and I have nothing left.
Here Are 6 Signs That Opened My Eyes To Give Me A Chance To Perceive How I Lost Control Of My Life
Life is by all accounts just fate and despair
Regardless of the quantity of the substance I took, my addiction made me feel disillusioned about life in general. There was a bleak feeling within me which overwhelmed my senses thereby holding me stagnant. Then, all I felt were guilt and frustration getting into me, I pictured my beloved family and friends were disappointed by me I almost could not forgive myself. Then, all I felt were guilt and frustration getting into me, I pictured my beloved family and friends were disappointed by me I almost could not forgive myself. Everything in my life was telling me that I was the worst person for letting down everyone who cared about me, that I have made the worst mistakes over and over again. The frustration and guilt were like a loop, went on and on, giving me an excuse to go back to using the reason of the frustration, I did not realize that I was feeding the loop. Apparently, by taking more and more frequently, the spiral of the destruction of oneself which I actively participated in took its darkest and heaviest turn and made me feel I was approaching the critical'point'at'which'turning back'or'reversal'is impossible. At this juncture, the anxiety and the darkness in life became such a huge burden that though I was to elude, it was just driving me greater into my dependence.
Everything you had in life walked and then run away from you
A portion of the general population I had around me amid my time as a someone who is addicted remained by to help me until the very end, and for that, I'm extremely thankful. Some others couldn't take it any longer and left for good since they could just not see how my addiction functioned. However, as a result of how deep into my issues and challenges I was, I began to drive away even the people that desired to remain around to get me out of it. I became extremely bid with simply getting the next hit, that I allowed it eclipse all the other things. I skipped work because I just could not and would not go. I avoid meeting people I loved because I could not imagine myself without using for a long time, it tied me down. It was like living with a single thing in a tiny box, and that thing blinded me, dragging me out of the joy of life out the depression box.
You lose control over your life
Self-control was never my most powerful suit. When I was taking, I can't even recall the numbers of times I told myself it would be my last. I always wanted to take more of the substance during such times as a sign of my quitting the drug use. Dejection and anxiety assumed and I could not anymore confront any person or view individuals in the eye without feeling sorrow. I covered up in my loft day and night, dismissing whatever other obligations. My debt rose during this period. During sometimes the phone wouldn't cease calling because everyone comprehended there was something amiss happening in my life; I simply didn't need to say to them they were saying the truth. Not even when, where or even how much I utilized.
You use lies as shields for your problems
This was probably the thing that made things more severe than what they could've been. My dread of being judged or thrown out made me lie so regularly that at last, it was practically difficult to stay aware of the considerable number of things I had made up just to have the capacity to fulfil my compulsion. Financially I was a mess; I kept accumulating debts. Addiction was destroying my life in numerous ways, monetarily, emotionally and biologically. I never cherished my body rather I violated it. I began to starve myself, paid no attention to how I look and then a severe form of emaciation set in, and since everyone was aware I was facing difficult situations they tried to assist me in any form, rather my lies kept them at bay. It assembles a yet much greater and thicker divider amongst me and myself. I told myself various tales, debates and explanations to maintain utilizing that I think could've written a book on bad justifications to misuse drugs.
You follow after getting high to prevent withdrawal
Withdrawal is one of the baddest things a dependent can undergo. The worries and all those mixed feelings that make everything look like hell is something that I wanted to avoid by all possible means. I was utilizing to never lose that high feeling because I understood what came after and I couldn't handle it. There is this desire to take more drugs as an escape route due to the level of tension within you. What's more, because of the way that the more I utilized the more resilience I assembled, it turned out to be more regrettable inside time.
Nothing else is of importance
I drowned myself by reasons to keep using. Every connection with loved ones was broken by me. Every one of my feelings of dread turned out to be valid and I no longer thought about whatever else other than being high. I created a huge gap between myself and everyone else so no one could come across though some of them stood and waited for the chance to crossover just to assist me. I was totally blinded by my habit that virtually nothing else is significant. My supervisor fired me, my colleagues quit calling, the greater part of my family gradually surrendered and attempted to turn the page.
At this juncture, words from the ones I adored the most began to sink inside my head. Just when it all looked over to me, and I felt I was at my lowest point ever, it became clear to me that I needed assistance; the good thing was I had so many people who were willing to assist me to get over that grim phase.
The bad experience of addiction was something I would never want to get into again, it was probably as worse for my family and friends beside me, we buried the history deep down. A little knowledge about what substance abuse was would have made the whole situation less complicated. As things were moving out of control, those that constantly supported me were paying attention to all these signs that I could not see from the start.
I was saved by my loving and patient family and friends.
I thought all was lost but eventually, I undergo a recuperation process that opened my eyes to a fresh happy healthy life, where I haven't stopped thinking about my past but I pardon myself for what I did and asked for forgiveness with no embarrassment. It was intense, I won't lie, yet I'm truly glad that I wasn't the only one and that despite everything I have individuals who had faith in me until I was back on track.
Identifying these signs can bring a significant change into the life of a user, allowing them to understand that you still care irrespective of how sore things may turn out can be what will eventually light up the path to sobriety.